Allstate likes to remind us football season is mayhem, and NFL week 4 is no exception.
Some stories are best told in picture form.
Dolphins vs Someone (was someone playing beside Tua?)
Antonio Brown is reminding us the importance of taking head trauma seriously.
The Chargers and Texans played. That is all.
Importantly, the Eagles maintain their position.
Bears and prayers:
Finally, the Chicago Bears are glad they aren’t the only team to double-doink.
Though they lost against a team with a Running Back- Quarterback.
Quarterbacks are being booed by their own fans
And Russell Wilson must be president…
Becaus somehow everything is his fault. Also, he looks like he could sniff kid’s hair in this commercial.
The Baltimore Ravens were doing everything wrong (mostly).
The Washington Commanders are creepy, although not on a hair sniffing level.
Does their new name remind anyone of The Handmaid’s Tale? The new storm trooper outfits are not helping.
Scraps and craps:
DK Metcalf was being carted off the field, worrying every Seahawks fan.
So he could go to the bathroom.
During the bloodbath of a game, the Titans and Colts needed all the carts.
Other things happening in the background
Firstly, JJ Watt’s Atrial Fibrillation and cardioversion (the thing his heart was shocked with).
Secondly, Car accidents.
Thirdly, Hurricane Ian.
Lastly, the terrible referee calls. They were the only things more full of crap than the Seattle Seahawks’ locker room bathroom.
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